Fount: Father!
(Enter Gushing Fountain. As she speaks the braves become unnerved and exit.)
Chief: I do believe I'm about to be graced by the presence of an Indian
Fount: Father, I have just discovered, to my alarm and revulsion, the terms
       involved in the Cavalry's surrender. I am to be made the unhappy spouse
       of a man I not only do not know, but is also not of my culture, and, 
       in all reasonable probability, not of my religious persuasion. And if
       this wasn't insult enough, I also discovered that someone must
       volunteer to marry me! I, an Indian Princess, forced to suffer this
       indignation! Am I to stand for this? Who invented this tradition? 
       Erase it! Revoke it!
Chief: I gladly would, my child, but this tradition is a law written on
       Sacred Indian Tapestry. It is indelible and unalterable. All laws 
       of this nature are not to be touched.
Fount: Why not?
Chief: Because that is the first law written on Sacred Indian Tapestry.
       Besides, ever since those foreigners arrived, the economic state
       of the tribe has been something embarrassing. Our present victory was
       merely a stroke of luck. If you were to live away at the Fort with your
       new husband, it would be a boon to the tribe. 
Fount: So, it's the economic state of the tribe you're worried about? I have a
       little advice for you. Eliminate that quack medicine man you keep,
       Flying Squirrel, and that simpleton ward he keeps, Dipping
       Daisy. Have him marry someone, if you please, or at least his 
       do-nothing apprentice.

Chief: And lose our medicine man?
Fount: Precisely. (Sarcastically) While all the braves hunt, Flying Squirrel
       makes the sun rise. While all the braves fish, Flying Squirrel keeps
       the rivers running. While all the squaws bake and sew, his apprentice
       skips and dances to ward off evil spirits. And then, at the end of the
       day, the two of them dip into the tribe's net earnings. And you're
       worried about our economy?
       The man's a charlatan! A quack! A fake!
Chief: But the Hookapooka Tribe has been engaging a medicine man for
       centuries now. I cannot tamper with tradition. If I terminated his
       employment and the sun fell dead out of the sky, I would look quite 
       the fool.
Fount: Bah!
Chief: No, Fountain, we must make sure that we are only throwing over-board
       the superfluous.
Fount: But I am royalty. An Indian Princess cannot work! The very nature of
       what royalty purports to be places it above the laws and regulations
       designated to the common people that actually keep the nation going.
       The commoners need their figure-head and therefore, to guarantee the
       perpetuation of the figure-head, it is exempt from any rules or
       regulations that could harm it.
Chief: A point perfectly rendered. But, unfortunately, I already occupy that
       position which you have just described. The tribe, right now, is not
       enjoying the prosperity that affords understudies. It must be
       done, Fountain. The economy of the tribe is paramount!