Fount: Flying Squirrel, I am glad you are here. I want to speak with you alone. (Daisy and Squaws exit hastily) Squir: I am at your service. Fount: Are you a Medicine Man? Squir: I am. Fount: And do you perform spells? Squir: I do. Fount: Do you remember a spell you cast for me many years ago, at a time when I still respected you? Squir: Quite well. I cast a spell that guaranteed to supply you with a husband. But this was no ordinary love spell. You wanted a man whose love would be real. You wanted my magic to find the perfect man for you and bring the two of you together. I explained to you that such a complicated spell would take time. It would need to create chain reactions and change worldy events in order to succeed. I told you a spell that complex could take up to twenty years to complete its causation of improbabilities! You doubted my word and insisted that we write out a contract on Sacred Indian Tapesty. It stated if my spell did not provide the perfect man for you in a score of years, I would marry you, myself. Fount: And those twenty years end tomorrow. Squir: Quite so. Fount: Ah, poor fool, why did you make the agreement? Did you think you were safely distanced from the moment of truth? Twenty years is a long time, you thought - but here we are, just the same. No matter how far you set an event into the future, twenty, thirty, a hundred years, it still invariably becomes the present, just as real as the past from which you started. But you did not take this into consideration, did you? Confide in me. Were you not drinking fire water at the time? Squir: I never! (aside) I never should have. (aloud) I have no need to be concerned. (sarcasticsally) As much as I'd take great pride in becoming your husband, I can see my spell in action now. My powers are sending you a fine husband from the American Army. Fount: Don't become too hopeful. None will volunteer and you will be my husband. I will mould you into an honest man. After all, you're a tribal official. You're better than a commoner. You're better than a white man. You're better than nothing. Squir: I'm not worried. Your husband will be a Cavalry soldier. I'm quite encouraged! Fount: Encouraged? You'll soon become enlightened. Then you'll become engaged. (exits) Squir: And then I'd become enraged. Oh, twenty years! The words themselves give so much hope that the future catastrophes will become resolved. But all the future catastrophes ever become are the present catastrophes, if you wait long enough. (enter Daisy) Daisy: Flying Squirrel, has Gushing Fountain been trying to disturb our perfectly blissful symbiotic relationship again? Squir: Indeed she has. You corroborate that I am the wisest of magicians instead of a supernaturnal sham living the life of ease among our gullible associates - and I pretent to be training you in those same arts that allow you to also live an irresponsible existance. Now why would anyone insist on being mean-spirited enough to want to destroy such a wonderful relationship that is making two people so very happy? Daisy: I couldn't tell you. But it don't seem right. I would have confessed the truth years ago if you hadn't warned me about the wrath of the tribe that would befall you. Still... Squir: Daisy, have you forgotten the tremendous debt you owe me? Daisy: The debt? Squir: Have you forgotten that years ago I found you as a babe, lost in the woods, and saved your life by rescuing you from a ravenous hoard of rabid tit-mice? Daisy: Oh, dear! I had forgotten all about that. Perhaps it's because of the terrible pain I feel today. Squir: Now, what's this? Love-lonely already? It's only been a few days since you've seen your Private David Davenport, through no fault of his own. Daisy: Through Chief Barking Buffalo's fault. He's the one who's always making up laws and rules and decided, just to flaunt his power, that no white man would be allowed to enter Indian Grounds until a volunteer has married his elderly daughter. (enter Tipping Canoe) Canoe: Take heart, Daisy, I'm sure David is as lonely for you as you are for him. Squir: And if Tipping Canoe says so, it must be true. She's a nosey little gossip who finds out things that no one else can. Daisy: I wish I could believe you. Canoe: In truth, I have been all over except for Fort Gouting. Perhaps if I tell you some of the interesting pieces of information I've accumulated, it will cheer you up. Daisy: I never said I was interested in you gossip. Canoe: No one ever does - but they listen all the same.